first mommy diary entry

i finally get some time to blog. honestly, after eish arrievd there was nothing else i could do but tend to her needs. and im not complaining. i love it so much. i love taking care of her, i love looking at her, i love talking to her, i love feeding her, i love changing her diapers, i love carrying her, i love putting manznilla on her stomach when she has one of her colic attacks..oh my the list just goes on and on.

we're at our house, by the way. we only get to spend the weekends with her dad at their house, from saturday afternoon when her dad picks us up adn until tuesday mornings, since matt doesn't have a class during mondays. he's having his 3-day retreat at tagaytay today pala. he's supposed to go home tomorrow. and we can't wait. i mean, we've never really spent more than a day apart in more than two years now. i just..it's weird.

anyway, i'm supposed to go back to work yesterday. ict called me last friday and it took me until 10pm to sign the contract and have everything cleared and done. my trainingw as scheduled yesterday at 11am but i wasn't able to come since i couldn't have anyone look after eish for me. i mean, matt's not around, my mom's not able to take a leave and i just couldn't find myself a decent nanny. and even if i could, i feel like i don't have it in me to leave my baby with anyone i don't think i can trust. gosh. and i really really need to get back to work. i have a lot of bills piled up and a lot of things on our to-buy list.

i guess i don't know what to do right now. but i think my mom is right. she told me to simply take care fo eish as she grows. there are still a lot of jobs out there and they just have to wait. al;though im thinking, i've sent emails of my resume to a lot of different companies and i've been getting calls for invites to interviews but i just can't keep saying no. i mean, hello? i was the one who sent them in teh first place and when they take notice, i turn them down. may starcom and lola mo. taray.

oh wait. the new adventures of old christine is almost over. and it's time for sex and the city. good. it means i've been at this for almost half an hour already and she hasn't stirred or waken up or anything. which means she will in a few minutes time. you know, im still trying to keep track of her waking hours. usually, after she's fed, she sleeps for about 3hours and wakes up just to drink milk again. she doesn't complain of wee wee or poop in her diapers as long as she's fed. which is the reason why we found out last time she already has rashes in her butt area which we immediately fixed with lotion. the rashes are disappearing now but im not taking any chances and still put lotion on her buttocks. and i also do change her diaper every now and then, even if it's not too wet or even if she hasn't made poop yet. just to make sure. although it's costing us 160+ for a 24pc pack.